ArcaNuova · Life · Age · Letting go
Does It Still Carry My Life – or Am I the Only One Carrying It?
A question about obligations, possessions, relationships and clearing out one’s life in old age.
I used to search for doors. Today I wait to see whether one opens. And if it does not, the garden is beautiful too.
Something changes with the years.
You ask less: What else can I add?
And more: What am I still carrying?
Cars. Obligations. Roles. Expectations. Sometimes even relationships.
At seventy, you do not clear out the cellar. You clear out obligations.
Not from coldness. Not from ingratitude. More from a question:
Does it still carry my life? Or am I the only one carrying it?
Some things remain nevertheless.
Dogs, for example.
Time decides about people.
The sentence sounds simple. Perhaps it needs to be read twice.
Because time does not decide quickly.
Not one bad month. Not a screenshot. Not a cigarette. Not an argument.
Time is unpleasantly thorough.
It shows what carries you. And what was merely being carried.
I used to search for doors. Today I wait to see whether one opens. And if it does not, the garden is beautiful too.
